Is grief the most powerful teacher you've ever met?
If that question surprised you, then keep reading!
What is "Inviting Grief In For Tea?"
We are a community of people navigating difficult journeys related to all kinds of loss and grief. We are committed to learning how to show up for each other and ourselves and to transform our lives in meaningful ways. We feel inspired to contribute to the evolution of healthier cultural attitudes towards grief and loss.
Do any of these thoughts sound familiar to you?
“If I talk about it, I bring everyone else down.”
“There’s nothing anyone can do to change it, so I’ve just learned to keep it in and keep going.”
“My friends are going through their own things. I don’t want to burden them with my grief.”
“No one understands why this is so hard for me,” or "it’s not like someone died."
“I should just get over it," or “other people have gotten over worse.”
If you recognize any of these thoughts, you are probably feeling pretty isolated. I'm here to tell you that you don't have to walk your grief journey alone. You should not even try to do it alone!
When we try to grieve alone, we are more likely to fall into unhealthy grief practices and less likely to allow ourselves to grieve fully and deeply. This leads to unresolved grief. This can take a toll on our relationships, our physical and mental health, and our career and finances.
Maybe you are extra crabby with your kids, or less expressive with your partner. Maybe you are turning to junk food to fill a void. Maybe you are using alcohol or other substances to numb how you feel. Maybe you can't sleep. Maybe you are working constantly to avoid thinking about things that are too painful. You might struggle with chronic pain or other physical issues that are difficult to treat. You might be thinking, "I'm not even sure who I am anymore."
I'd like to share my story with you...
A few years ago, I was hit with the most terrible loss of my life. This involved witnessing a traumatic death that left me with flashbacks. I felt devastated, isolated, ashamed, and guilty. I questioned whether I would ever feel ok again. I was a solo parent to a young child that needed me to show up for him everyday. I had no support network. My boyfriend at the time left me because he felt overwhelmed by my grief. This reinforced my inner belief that I couldn’t talk to anyone about what I was going through. At this time in my life, I was the most grief-phobic person I knew. I had no idea HOW to grieve. All I knew was that I couldn't handle feeling the full depth of my emotions, so I turned to all kinds of techniques to avoid feeling them or even thinking about them.
Since then, I’ve learned a lot about grief, and about myself. I walked beside my father and a friend on their cancer and end-of-life journeys. These experiences inspired me to become an End-of-Life Doula. It was during my doula training that I first discovered I had not even begun to navigate my own grief. I had been squirreling it away for years. Loss after loss was packed away in neat boxes. These boxes were weighing me down in ways that affected my relationships, including with my son. It was also taking a toll on my physical and mental health, as well as on my work as both an artist and doula.
The more I worked on my grief, the more layers I discovered I had to unveil. Along the way, I discovered that I was learning things that were transforming how I lived my life. I was becoming a more authentic version of myself. I was finding what mattered most to me and living my life in alignment with my priorities. Grief had become the most powerful teacher of my life.
As I have walked side-by-side with clients who are grieving, I’ve discovered some common themes:
- People feel isolated. People lack support networks or don’t want to burden people with their grief. When they try to talk to people, they are met with: cliches, pressure to get over it, or some other response that leaves them feeling worse rather than better.
- Grief leads people to turn to unhealthy behaviors, and people often don’t know what “healthy” habits look like with regards to grief.
- People let their inner negative BS (believe systems) make them feel worse or prevent them from reaching out for support.
- Most people, even those who have experienced grief themselves, don’t know how to show up for someone who is grieving. We are a grief illiterate society.
- Therapy is important, and also therapists are expensive, they can be hard to find and grief doesn’t stick to the "therapy schedule."
My personal experiences with loss, grief, and chronic pain have intuitively led me to want to help people navigate their own grief journeys. In addition, my studies, and my professional work with others have inspired my passionate desire to contribute to a shift in cultural attitudes towards grief.
That’s how I decided to create the "Inviting Grief In For Tea" community for people whose lives have been impacted by grief. It is a community for those who want to receive support and also learn how to support others. We invite those who will take what they learn and use it for two things: first to improve their own lives, and secondly, to go out into their communities and contribute to a shift in cultural attitudes around grief.
Why should we grieve in a community?
I’ve always tended to do things on my own, but that changed when I learned a few key things on my own grief journey:
- I’ve learned how powerful it is to have someone hold space for me while I grieve. I also found that holding space for others helped me as well as them.
- I realized that when I opened up about my thoughts, feelings and experiences to others, it was like shining a light on the dark places where my negative belief systems were hiding. Suddenly, I could see them clearly and and became aware of how they were keeping me "stuck."
- I learned that there was so much to KNOW that was helpful. I also discovered how powerful and transformative it was when I could discuss what I was learning with others.
- I saw how my life changed when I changed my relationship with grief. I’ve seen the impact on my physical and mental health, my relationships, my work as an artist and doula, and the shift in how abundantly meaningful my life feels.
- Witnessing how much unresolved grief is out there, especially after the pandemic, I felt overwhelmed for a while. I wanted to reach everyone! I decided that creating the "From Grief to Growth" community would both help me reach many more people than just offering one-on-one grief coaching. I saw the potential of a community to have an impact outside its virtual boundaries, as members transform their own lives and inspire people around them to do the same.
In short, COMMUNITY IS KEY. Together we can do SO MUCH MORE than we can do alone!
The Results You'll Get
Our community is pretty special. We know grief. We know how hard it is to grieve alone, and the toll that unprocessed grief takes on individual lives, families, and communities. We want to change how grief is perceived and processed. We’re focused on the ways being part of this community will make a huge difference in your life.
Here are a few of the things you’ll be able to do as a member of "Inviting Grief In For Tea:"
- Build meaningful connections through sharing stories and engaging in healing practices with others whose lives have been impacted by grief.
- Develop skills to effectively hold space for others who are grieving while receiving this gift yourself and experiencing the difference it makes.
- Discover what grief can teach you about yourself, and how to use this knowledge in ways to make your life richer and more meaningful than ever before.
When You Join Today
When you join "Inviting Grief In For Tea" today, you’ll get access to our:
- Live Group Coaching Sessions: We use these live sessions to connect with other members, to engage in facilitated discussions, to receive support, and to practice new skills and techniques for supporting others
- 24/7 Access to Virtual Discussion & Support Groups: Groups are another great place to connect with fellow members by sharing stories, thoughts, challenges, celebrations, questions and ideas. As membership grows, specialized groups will be opened up for specific areas of focus, based on members' grief support needs and interests.
- Book of the Month Club: Every month we will explore a book that provides food for thought and discussion on the subject of grief. Members who aren't reading the book can feel free to learn from the discussions. (Discussions from past months will remain open so members who read the books on a different schedule can still contribute to the discussion!)
- Creative Studio: Creative expression can be extremely therapeutic. You don't have to be "good" at creating. The important thing is to simply create and to benefit from the experience. This is a space to share your creative explorations and to get ideas from fellow members. We will also have workshops to learn new creative techniques and to spend time creating together.
- Courses, webinars and special events coming soon!
Come join us!
We believe support and community should be available to everyone. For this reason membership is available on a sliding scale and you can choose your membership tier based on what you can afford. All 3 tiers have the same access. If you chose the Tier 1 membership you will be helping to bring more workshops, special guests and events to the community, and to allow us to offer the Tier 3 level membership to make this community affordable to more people.
Tier 1: $49.99/month
Tier 2: $24.99/month
Tier 3: $14.99/month
Or…commit to walk this journey of discovery with us for a year and you will get two months free as a reward for your commitment!
Not sure if this is right for you? Give us a try for 7 days for free!
